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91
Meditations and ponderings / Re: Just For Today
« Last post by CD on August 04, 2015, 08:30:35 PM »
August 4 , 2015

When is a secret not a secret?

“Addicts tend to live secret lives....  It is a great relief to get rid of all our secrets and to share the burden of our past.”

Basic Text, p. 32

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We’ve heard it said that “we’re as sick as our secrets.”  What do we keep secret, and why?

We keep secret those things that cause us shame.  We may hold onto such things because we don’t want to surrender them.  Yet if they’re causing us shame, wouldn’t we live more easily with ourselves if we were rid of them?

Some of us hold onto the things that cause us shame for another reason.  It’s not that we don’t want to be rid of them; we just don’t believe we can be rid of them.  They’ve plagued us for so long, and we’ve tried so many times to rid ourselves of them, that we’ve stopped hoping for relief.  Yet still they shame us, and still we keep them secret.

We need to remember who we are: recovering addicts.  We who tried so long to keep our drug use a secret have found freedom from the obsession and compulsion to use.  Though many of us enjoyed using right to the end, we sought recovery anyway.  We just couldn’t stand the toll our using was taking on us.  When we admitted our powerlessness and sought help from others, the burden of our secret was lifted from us.

The same principle applies to whatever secrets may burden us.  Yes, we’re as sick as our secrets.  Only when our secrets stop being secret can we begin to find relief from those things that cause us shame.

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Just for today:  My secrets can make me sick only as long as they stay secret.  Today, I will talk with my sponsor about my secrets.

Copyright © 1991-2015 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

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92
Meditations and ponderings / Re: Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
« Last post by CD on August 04, 2015, 08:29:10 PM »
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote              8/4/15


You will be receiving many gifts from people in the programs: gifts of help, time, energy, possibly money, talents, and knowledge. You will never be able to pay them all back. You are not obligated to pay them back. You are obligated to pay them forward by giving away what you have when you can.

I appreciate the generosity of others and pay it forward when I am able.
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Meditations and ponderings / Re: Just For Today
« Last post by CD on August 03, 2015, 03:16:39 PM »
August 3 , 2015

Trusting people

“Many of us would have had nowhere else to go if we could not have trusted NA groups and members.”

Basic Text, p. 81

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Trusting people is a risk.  Human beings are notoriously forgetful, unreliable, and imperfect.  Most of us come from backgrounds where betrayal and insensitivity among friends were common occurrences.  Even our most reliable friends weren’t very reliable.  By the time we arrive at the doors of NA, most of us have hundreds of experiences bearing out our conviction that people are untrustworthy.  Yet our recovery demands that we trust people.  We are faced with this dilemma:  People are not always trustworthy, yet we must trust them.  How do we do that, given the evidence of our pasts?

First, we remind ourselves that the rules of active addiction don’t apply in recovery.  Most of our fellow members are doing their level best to live by the spiritual principles we learn in the program.  Second, we remind ourselves that we aren’t 100% reliable, either.  We will surely disappoint someone in our lives, no matter how hard we try not to.  Third, and most importantly, we realize that we need to trust our fellow members of NA.  Our lives are at stake, and the only way we can stay clean is to trust these well-intentioned folks who, admittedly, aren’t perfect.

––––=––––

Just for today:  I will trust my fellow members.  Though certainly not perfect, they are my best hope.

Copyright © 1991-2015 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

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94
Meditations and ponderings / Re: Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
« Last post by CD on August 03, 2015, 03:15:41 PM »
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote      8/3/15


Our feelings don't define us, our actions do. We are not bad because we have a quick temper--but we learn that expressing that anger hurts others. The longer we keep our temper the more it improves.

I am only as big as the smallest thing that makes me angry.
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Meditations and ponderings / Re: Just For Today
« Last post by CD on August 01, 2015, 09:57:34 PM »
August 1 , 2015

Freedom from guilt

“Our addiction enslaved us.  We were prisoners of our own mind and were condemned by our own guilt.”

Basic Text, p. 7

––––=––––

Guilt is one of the most commonly encountered stumbling blocks in recovery.  One of the more notorious forms of guilt is the self-loathing that results when we try to forgive ourselves but don’t feel forgiven.

How can we forgive ourselves so we feel it?  First, we remember that guilt and failure are not links in an unbreakable chain.  Honestly sharing with a sponsor and with other addicts shows this to be true.  Often the result of such sharing is a more sensible awareness of the part we ourselves have played in our affairs.  Sometimes we realize that our expectations have been too high.  We increase our willingness to participate in the solutions rather than dwelling on the problems.

Somewhere along the way, we discover who we really are.  We usually find that we are neither the totally perfect nor the totally imperfect beings we have imagined ourselves to be.  We need not live up to or down to our illusions; we need only live in reality.

––––=––––

Just for today:  I am grateful for my assets and accept my liabilities.  Through willingness and humility, I am freed to progress in my recovery and achieve freedom from guilt.

Copyright © 1991-2015 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

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96
Meditations and ponderings / Re: Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
« Last post by CD on August 01, 2015, 09:55:00 PM »
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote       8/1/15


No matter how hard you attempt to control the people in your life, you will not find your fulfillment there. If they don't change, you will be frustrated; if they do change under your pressure, they will be frustrated.

If I look to others for fulfillment, I will never be fulfilled.
97
Meditations and ponderings / Re: Just For Today
« Last post by CD on July 31, 2015, 08:01:53 PM »
July 31 , 2015

Freedom from active addiction

“Narcotics Anonymous offers only one promise and that is freedom from active addiction, the solution that eluded us for so long.”

Basic Text, p. 106

––––=––––

NA offers no promises other than freedom from active addiction.  It is true that some of our members meet with financial success in recovery.  They buy nice houses, drive new cars, wear fine clothes, and form beautiful families.  These outward signs of prosperity are not the lot of all of our members, however.  A great many of us never achieve financial success.  This does not necessarily reflect on the quality of our recovery.

When we are tempted to compare ourselves to these other, seemingly more affluent members, it is good to remember why we came to the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous.  We came because our lives had fallen down around us.  We were emotionally, physically, and spiritually defeated.  Our Basic Text reminds us that “in desperation we sought help from each other in Narcotics Anonymous.”  We came because we were beaten.

For addicts, even one day clean is a miracle.  When we remember why we came to Narcotics Anonymous and in what condition we arrived, we realize that material wealth pales in comparison to the spiritual riches we have gained in recovery.

––––=––––

Just for today:  I have been given a spiritual gift greater than material wealth: my recovery.  I will thank the God of my understanding for my freedom from active addiction.

Copyright © 1991-2015 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

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98
Meditations and ponderings / Re: Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote
« Last post by CD on July 31, 2015, 08:00:28 PM »
Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote     7/31/15


You don't have to pretend to be someone you are not. You don't have to pretend to be strong (if you're a man) or fem (if you're a woman). You don't have to pretend that you don't want to use, if you do. Share what is real. The real you is enough.

I am enough; there is enough.
99
Online Narcotics Anonymous open meetings / Re: New chat
« Last post by Isaac on July 31, 2015, 07:56:45 AM »
When do meetings take place on Tinychat?
100
Meditations and ponderings / Re: Just For Today
« Last post by CD on July 30, 2015, 03:22:28 PM »
July 30 , 2015

Regular inventory

“Continuing to take a personal inventory means that we form a habit of looking at ourselves, our actions, attitudes, and relationships on a regular basis.”

Basic Text, p. 42

––––=––––

Taking a regular inventory is a key element in our new pattern of living.  In our addiction, we examined ourselves as little as possible.  We weren’t happy with how we were living our lives, but we didn’t feel that we could change the way we lived.  Self-examination, we felt, would have been a painful exercise in futility.

Today, all that is changing.  Where we were powerless over our addiction, we’ve found a Power greater than ourselves that has helped us stop using.  Where we once felt lost in life’s maze, we’ve found guidance in the experience of our fellow recovering addicts and our ever-improving contact with our Higher Power.  We need not feel trapped by our old, destructive patterns.  We can live differently if we choose.

By establishing a regular pattern of taking our own inventory, we give ourselves the opportunity to change anything in our lives that doesn’t work.  If we’ve started doing something that causes problems, we can start changing our behavior before it gets completely out of hand.  And if we’re doing something that prevents problems from occurring, we can take note of that, too, and encourage ourselves to keep doing what works.

––––=––––

Just for today:  I will make a commitment to include a regular inventory in my new pattern of living.

Copyright © 1991-2015 by Narcotics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved

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